Suffering – Walk in Trust

The Cross is not optional

When Our Blessed Mother first called me to Our Lady’s Chapel during the 2020 crises, I was in awe of what I saw and heard from these priests and I pondered what the actual difference between them and what I was seeing back in our parishes could be. She spoke to my spirit: ‘these priests aren’t afraid of the cross’. Wow…that was such a powerful moment for me. “crosses” come in many shapes and sizes. Caring too much about what the stereotypical ‘Karen’ thinks, for example, can be a form of trying to escape the cross.

There are so many ways both big and small where I’m tempted to run from my daily crosses. Lord give me the courage and strength to always persevere in doing Your Will.

Egssactly!!!

They say that Autism parenting carries with it a comparable stress level to that of a soldier.See article here. I believe it! It’s not usually big things…it’s the constant barrage of the little stuff…the splat of an egg for instance.

I’m in the school room which is open to the kitchen. I hear ‘splat’ and I tense up and think ‘oh crap, not again’ ok…not those exact words but I do have to edit myself a bit, I don’t know who may be reading this…lol. I approach my son, knowing exactly what just happened. And lo and behold there it is…a splattered egg on my kitchen floor.

Now here is the question that beckons asking. Why? This child doesn’t even like eggs. Won’t even take a single bite. So what does he like? He likes…well brace yourself for this…he likes juggling them. Yes…I’m going to hide in shame for not having been able to ‘fix’ this little problem yet. See…that’s what Autism moms do…or maybe it’s just me…but we wallow in shame and self condemnation. There is certainly a secret or a key, that will just magically make all of this ok…right? I’m just too blind to have discovered it yet. 🙁

Renovation Project

It just occurred to me that God doesn’t allow major shakedowns in our life in order to do us in, but to solidify us in our convictions. He hates ‘warm’ remember? And there is no such thing as ‘good enough’ in the spiritual realm. Sometimes there are severe cracks in the foundation and a bulldozer needs to come in…but it’s all part of the renewal project. He won’t leave us like that…all torn apart and seemingly destroyed…He’s just building a castle where a broken down hut used to be. Will we let him?