The daily grind of an ADHD contemplative, in her 6th decade of this pilgrimage called life.
Another repeated message from the retreat was “a call to love is a call to serve.”
We all know that love can bring such wonderful warm, fuzzy feelings…but that’s just the packaging…not the content of the gift. It’s often easy to forget that, once the wrapping is out of the way. 😉 We are not called to love for the the feelings it produces in us…but for the sake of the other.
God often whispered little tid bits into my heart throughout the day. One morning while in the chapel as I was observing the monks I had the thought… “They are doing battle in the front lines, will you join them?’
I got the sense that this call to action wasn’t merely about joining them in prayer that morning, but as a call on my life. That yes, they are on the front lines of the spiritual battle while in the cloister (I used to often think they they were behind the scenes) but it’s not the only way. That our own lives out in the world, lived out in His presence would serve the same purposes.
Each day that we were there, we were scheduled to have a conference on a specific topic. We only ended up having two conferences because Fr. Peter, our retreat director became ill. The topic he chose for us was forgiveness. I’m going to jot down here, some of the notes I took.
*We all have some sort of  ‘unfinished business’, loose ends that need to be tied.
*When we say “I don’t want to deal anymore” that is a sort of revenge and a sign that you haven’t reached forgiveness.
*Forgive but don’t ‘enable’…you need to either speak up…or ‘separate’ if necessary.
*Forgiving is NOT forgetting.
*Don’t just say ‘I forgive you’…don’t say it too easily…honesty is more important.
*When you can’t seem to forgive, then pray for the other person.
*Forgiveness from the heart stems from prayer…it is a grace.
*Choose to focus on the good instead of the bad of the other person.
*Sometimes the person that you need to forgive is yourself.
*If you don’t find love ‘here’, you won’t find it ‘there’. It starts within yourself. Fr. mentioned how in the Benedictine Rule, only if you live well in community are you then allowed to become a hermit.
Sometimes at difficult points in our lives God connects us with kindred spirits. Those soul friends that get you through and through, that may be going through very similar circumstances at the moment and have similar lessons to learn. It is such a gift. Such as the case of Mary and Elizabeth. When Mary found out that she was with child, she ran to her cousin Elizabeth who was with child also…and were able to support each other. We all need that. Be open to it!
Otherwise the dark moments can seem overwhelming, hopeless even. We need someone to light the way for us so that we can see Jesus in our circumstances. To give us a kick in the pants when we need it (gently of course). And in the next breath be able to tell us how absolutely awesomely strong and amazing we are.Â
Those dark moments can be compared to being in labor. If you didn’t have the forethought to know the glorious miracle that was about to happen…the great gift that you would soon receive, you would be very willing to give it all up just a few minutes into it. Life can be like that…but we are often blind to anything but what is right in front of us. We need others to remind us. We need labor coaches…lol. We need someone there that will tell us that the horrifying pain that we are enduring at the moment will indeed pass away and there will be joy in the morning. That it is all worth it. That what we are doing is birthing Christ Himself. That good will come from our pain.
If you don’t have such a person in your life at the moment, then allow the original Christ bearer to be there with you…Mary! Â
I’m in the process of renewing my Consecration to Mary, to be completed on September 8th. If you haven’t yet done one and have a devotion to her, I would highly recommend it. It’s simply asking her to be your coach. 😉
If step one was a vertical beam coming from heaven to you, then step two is a horizontal beam…going from you to your brothers and sisters in Christ. Place them together and you have the perfect symbol of Christianity…the CROSS!Â
Man was not created to be alone. We have a heart overflowing with longing for God that will be completely fulfilled when we reach heaven, but meanwhile we need Him with skin on…we need each other.Â
I love the parable of the The Long Spoons .
The moral of the story is that we need each other. I often have good and faithful friends tell me about how they get wonderful insights on how to bless others, and they are able to give amazing advice which sometimes leaves them feeling perplexed as to where it even came from. I have experienced the same thing myself. And yet when it comes to our own lives, the most basic of things completely eludes us. It’s as if a blindness covers our eyes. I will sometimes be speaking to a friend, and when they mention a particular thing I’ll be like ‘well…duhhh…why didn’t I think of that’…lol. Well…there is a reason why we don’t. We were given ‘long spoons’. We were meant to have our pressing needs met by others, and then have enough humility to accept from others what we can’t do for ourselves also. That is Christianity at it’s best. We receive grace, love and inspiration from our heavenly Father and we pass it on. We become vehicles of grace!Â
I really believe that this is the importance behind the whole ‘become as little children’ and humility teachings of the Church. Yes, these teachings are helpful for accepting Christ and acquiring salvation…but they are also imperative in communing with Christ in the flesh. Allowing Him to feed us in the here and now…by seeing Him in our brothers and sisters, not only those that need to be fed…but to be accepting of those that can feed us.Â
Personally, this is part of what is so wrong with the liberal agenda. They place all of this in the government’s hands. It is anti Christian! It steals from us the graces that come our way by personally helping others. Â
http://steppingintoit.com/2014/06/12/hiding-from-love/
P66. “One of the results of isolation is that we lose grace and truth. Generally, harmful hiding cuts us off from some combination of healing: unconditional relationship (grace) and some types of information that we need (truth). These two dynamics are the main ingredients of spiritual and emotional growth and repair. They work together like sunlight and soil to bring about the fruit of maturity in our lives. Without them we wilt.”
Using the Lazarus story again. He needed to come out of the grave of isolation and be in community in order to have his grave clothes removed. How that must have hurt as every stinking layer was pulled back.
For the sensitive soul, it all can seem overwhelming and maybe not even worth the pain. But those ‘coverings’ need to come off in order for us to live in total freedom the life that The Lord has designed for us.
I’ve determined that I need to make some changes in my life in order to feel ‘nourished’ in mind, body and soul. In a previous post, I listed the areas that are important to me. I’ve decided to start working on it, one area at a time…just baby steps…and hopefully I can connect with someone else out there that may be reading this and we can inspire each other.
So from that list I’ve come up with these six target areas that I need to address, so that what I believe is more in line with what I do. I will be following up on each one in greater detail as I go along. For now I’m just setting up a ‘wish list’ if you will.
1)First target area is that entire realm of health, with diet and exercise being the most predominant factors. I’m what some would consider ‘crunchy’. I believe in the power of wholesome foods and herbs for keeping us strong and healthy. I believe in embracing a fairly clean diet and exercise program as a way of life, one that provides energy and does not make me or my family ill. I believe that pharmaceuticals have a purpose, but should be kept to a minimum.Â
As an Autism mom, the book that has made the most sense to me in explaining the why as well as offering a solution is The GAPS diet. So this is what I aim for in my family…or at least The Paleo diet which is very similar and more people are familiar with it.Â
2)Intimacy with my Creator. For me as a Catholic, at the top of that list is frequent Reception of the Sacraments in a place that feels authentic. I’ve found that as a ‘sensitive soul’ a more traditional setting serves me best. I like all the bells and whistles in my Liturgy.
3)Intimacy with others. To be in relationships where I can lay it all out and feel accepted for who I am but yet challenged to be better. To be surrounded and reaffirmed by people who are similarly called. Where I can both feed and be fed and nurtured and can have a safe exchange of ideas.
4)To guide and nurture my children in the most authentic way possible. Being attentive to their special needs and distinct calling. For me, this involves choosing a homeschooling curriculum that fits our needs. And developing a method of discipline that reaches their heart.
5)To live in an organized and fairly clean setting. Surrounded by nature and beauty. Beautiful music, art and good books surround me.It means de cluttering my living spaces and putting together a cleaning schedule that works for us. A la Flylady.
6)To express my creativity and make a living at it.
Productivity is of huge importance to me, as is providing financially for my family and for the things that The Lord puts in my heart of course. Right now, my photography is my passion. I believe that this is my current calling, and the tool that I’m to use to connect to others.
Oh please, please, please…do yourself a huge favor and go watch this video. These girls are amazing. And yes…the lyrics are right on! <3
And isn’t that picture of them just perfect?
(Click on picture to take you to Amazon)
I’m in the middle of reading this book and it is amazing! It really gets down to the root of most of our problems today.
“God had a “plan A” for us: a life of unbroken connectedness with Him and each other. Not only was there to be unbroken attachment, but we were also to experience a deep, satisfying sense of purpose and accomplishment in performing the task that He gave us.”
So we were meant to live our lives feeling deeply loved and appreciated, in relationship with Him and our brothers, with a sense of purpose and productivity. WOW! No wonder so many of us ‘sensitive souls’ just feel so darn restless all the time. Our main connections are either totally gone, or so distorted that it’s difficult to draw an ounce of pure love from them. Like trying to breathe in a polluted environment.
Also the productivity thing…yea…umm…take a look around. It’s not that we aren’t ‘busy’ enough…I mean, no one has time for anything as it is, right? But how ‘productive’ are we really? What are we putting out? Do we have pride of accomplishment in our work? It doesn’t matter what it is…a farmer, a writer, an artist, a home maker, a contemplative nun…all productive members of society. It’s in our mind set and how we go about our lives.
And I also venture to say that the two are connected. As in…by being ‘productive’ we serve our brothers and sisters and thereby enter into relationship…and as we enter into relationship and feel loved, we want to be more productive. The ultimate example of this of course being marriage. Where are called to be fruitful and multiply…in other words, be productive!”
Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
(Genesis 1:28)
Long Spoons in Heaven and Hell–author unknown
A holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said, “Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.” The Lord led the holy man to two doors. He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a large pot of stew which smelled delicious and made the holy man’s mouth water. The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful, but because the handle was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into their mouths. The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering. The Lord said, “You have seen Hell”.
They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large pot of stew which made the holy man’s mouth water. The people were equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were well nourished and plump, laughing and talking. The holy man said, “I don’t understand.” “It is simple,” said the Lord, “it requires but one skill. You see, they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of themselves.” When Jesus died on the cross he was thinking of you!
